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Too Funny [May. 21st, 2009|09:17 am]
New Jersey Devils

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[djdysfunction]
I had to keep checking the heading on this article, to remind myself that I wasn't reading The Onion. But apparently, it's true.... Sean Avery has opened up a sports bar in Manhattan, complete with a framed print of Avery scoring on Marty hanging on the wall.

Here's the article



By Greg Wyshynski

New York Rangers winger, former Vogue intern and fashion glasses enthusiast Sean Avery(notes) opened his new "sports bar meets country club" nightspot Warren 77 last Friday night, which is located on 77 Warren Street in Manhattan. As luck would have it, a Rangers season-ticket holder named Dave managed to make it into the club for its debut [H/T to 5-Hole] and sent a first-person account to Ranger Rants:

"We were standing right at the bar where the waitresses would come so every now and then Avery would come by and check on things and we would have quick, 10-second conversations with him. I thanked him for having Molson on tap and he said it wouldn't be a hockey bar without it. We wished him luck on the new bar. He even accidentally elbowed my wife and kept apologizing, which was kind of funny. He was really cool as well. Shanny walked by. I asked him if he had one more year in him and he said that he wasn't sure yet. From the looks of it, I am not too sure."

Well, in fairness, it was a party. Dave added that there was a print ready for framing above the bar of Avery scoring on New Jersey Devils goalie Martin Brodeur(notes).

Like any New York City party, it brought out the celebrities: Brendan Shanahan(notes), Henrik Lundqvist(notes), Brad Richards(notes) of the Dallas Stars (seriously, and don't tell Modano), John McEnroe, Larry "Ratso" Sloman, Food Network chef Anne Burrell ... and really, what party is complete without Larry Brooks of the New York Post? From the NY Observer:

It's the type of place you'd expect to see scruffy brutes quaffing pints of Molson Canadian while their waifish girlfriends gingerly sip flutes of sancerre. "I don't get treated this nice at most places," said New York Post hockey writer Larry Brooks, whom Mr. Avery greeted with a clink of glasses and some good-humored teasing.

"You don't dress this nice at work," the former Vogue intern told the typically slovenly sportswriter, who showed up in a tucked-in button-up shirt and slacks.

Ain't no party like a Larry Brooks party 'cause a Larry Brooks party don't stop. Anyhoo, know this about Warren 77: It has video game tables and Guinness, Hoegaarden, Old Speckled Hen and Molson at the bar. Which is great. But in the end, the verdict from RARE Daily is that Avery's spot is a "hipster sports bar," which means:

[It's] an old-school cross between Peter Luger - with dark wood walls and an imposing oak bar - and the basement rec-room from an '80s teen flick, furnished by a set designer with very good taste.

If that sounds like your pint of Molson, there you go. Sure as hell beats Bud Lights at the ESPN Zone. Say ... wonder what they call the doggie bags at Avery's bar?

For a second, I thought, "wouldn't it be fun to get a shitload of Devils fans out there all wearing our jerseys?" Then, I realized, the second a Devils fan spends a dime at this douchebags joint, the joke is on them. It's unfortunate, because if it were any other Ranger, I think it would be fun to go there, just as a hockey fan. But I don't think I could bring myself to spend my money on anything Avery.
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